21 Day Fast: Day 10

Sunday in our new Knowing God class the question was asked, ” What does being an heir of Christ mean to you.?” I listened as we went around the room to the different thoughts and all I could matter of factly say when it got to me was, “Everything Jesus has is mine.

And then I thought of the scripture that says 12 “Truly, truly, I say to you, whoever believes in me will also do the works that I do; and greater works than these will he do, because I am going to the Father.13 Whatever you ask in my name, this I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son. 14 If you ask me anything in my name, I will do it. ( John 14)

I don’t feel like I have done greater works. Three amazing people that I know in the last couple of months have gone on to be with the Lord. I look at their lives and think: when I die what legacy will I have left behind?

I’m not out taking care of the homeless although I have helped when we were pastoring another church. I haven’t been out in the world protecting people from harm and although I pastored with my husband for 17 years, I was pretty much in the background. Not sitting on my butt and doing nothing, as I am always doing something but most of what I do is behind the scenes making everyone else look great.

I love that part of my life because I love helping people become who they were meant to be. I’m not a person that needs to be famous although I do love a praise or two for the work I do sometimes. I mean I am human after all.

I love standing in front of a group of people and sharing my experiences with them for the sole purpose of encouraging (my #1 spiritual gift) them in their relationships with the Lord but if I walk in a room full of strangers and I’m not the speaker or in charge, I’m your typical wallflower. Well…….unless you talk to me. Then I will talk your head off.

I did write a book but it’s about fasting but (really?) who reads a lot of books about fasting by an unknown author? I have given out more books then I sold. Of course, we didn’t do much to publish it cause we were saving that work for my next book. And at the rate I am going, I may die before I publish that one.

But what about the “greater things”? I can’t pinpoint any of those things in my life. I don’t think I lack the faith to accomplish them. One of my top spiritual gifts is faith. I have a very introvert but wanna be extrovert type of personality so I’m not much of an initiator UNLESS I’m put in charge of something. Then I initiate like crazy.

I have a lot of faith. I believe when everyone else wants to give up. Often I can see the end result but then again often I’m way ahead in my dreams and visions and they get put on the shelf until someone else comes along and puts them in place or makes it happen hahahahha. You know what? It really doesn’t matter who makes it happen just as long as it happens.

So during this fast, I’m asking God to show me if I am supposed to be doing “greater works” then what I am doing. I just don’t want to miss out or not help someone with something when I should. Jesus was all about changing people’s lives. When I attended the “Celebration of Life” services for these people, I’m amazed at how many people these people have been touched or had their lives changed because those who passed on were doing the “Greater Works”.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have guilt feelings because everything I do do I put 100% effort into it. But am I doing enough? Am I loving enough? Am I encouraging enough?

The scripture says to love our neighbors as we love ourself. Heck, I don’t even know my neighbors. Ok, I know the word neighbors is a broad territory. It’s not that I don’t want to know them but it’s sure not the world I grew up in anymore. People are so busy that they don’t even have time to do things together anymore or perhaps it’s just because they don’t make the time. And I certainly don’t try to ignore my neighbors. I try to catch their eye just to smile or say, “Hi”. I even tried to help one of my neighbors find their missing dog. And I entertained three of my other neighbor’s dogs when they came through a hole under the fence until she got back. Ok so I am a dog lover: guilty!

Jesus said whatever we ask in His name He would do so that the Father would be glorified. That’s my prayer: what “greater works” can I do so that my Father will be glorified. Those are the things I truly want to ask Jesus for. Now if I could just get these thoughts to quit spinning in my brain………………Maybe they will now since I’ve just written them out.

So the last couple days of the fast have been a bit rough for me physically. My stomach is not happy and yesterday as I was writing this blog I fell asleep for two hours. Not sure if the fast is messing with my stomach or some kind of virus keeps trying to attach itself to me. I’ve been battling it for months. Could be allergies. I just don’t know. But in the midst of it all, I press onward looking forward to what the Lord has to say to me today!